180: Emperor Marcus Aurelius dies: a tearful day for his son Commodus, but not good for Maximus Decimus Meridius – commander of the armies of the north, general of Felix Legion and loyal servant of the true emperor – who becomes the father of a murdered son, husband of a murdered wife, and decides that he will get his revenge in this or the next life.
461: Saint Patrick, Irish patron saint, dies. Although the year is controversial, the date is certainly not.
1737: The Charitable Irish Society hosts the first St Patrick’s Day parade ever in…. Boston, USA. Ireland eventually follows suit in the 19th century.
1762: New York hosts are the first procession – a parade that has subsequently become the world’s largest with 150,000 participants, two million spectators and a five-hour march. Some Irish soldiers serving in the English army march through the city, playing some music and complaining about the weather.
1777: Father Patrick Brontë was born in County Down, where he lived until he was 25. Ordained as an Anglican priest, it is as a literal father that he gains lasting fame. Tragically, he continues to survive his entire literary offspring and dies at a mature age of 84.
1780: George Washington gives the soldiers of Irish descent under his command a day off “as an act of solidarity with the Irish in their struggle for independence”. It was wishful thinking from the king of the revolutionaries, as they have to wait another 141 years.
1861: Monarchy of Italy proclaimed. It does not last long.
1880: Captain Oates, the Antarctic explorer, is born.
1888: A cartoon appears in Harper’s Weekly presenting a scene from a St Patrick’s Day parade in New York City. It depicts the double standards of an American of Irish descent who frowns at the thought of celebrating a saint who was not even born in Ireland. He inexplicably tells a passing woman that Patrick was French. So useless in history as well as geography.
1912: After a few renditions of Happy Birthday, Captain Oates, the Antarctic explorer, tells the Polar Expedition: “I’m going right outside, and it might be some time.” All to escape Captain Scott’s song.
1937: Dublin hosts the first parade to be held in a free Ireland. The parade attracts an annual attendance of 500,000.
1939: Giovanni Trapattoni is born, and 70 years later the Italian would repeat millions of fans worldwide as a deliberate Thierry Henry handball prevents Ireland from qualifying for the 2010 World Cup. supply from his sister, a nun) in the grave – and a level of English that even the Irish cannot understand (‘Trappish’ according to local media). But everything is forgiven when Ireland qualifies for the Euro 2012 – their first major tournament in 10 years.
1940: There is no St Patrick’s Day. No, not because of the war, but because of a clash with Palm Sunday, which caused the Catholic Church to move the day to April 3rd. In 2008, another clash with Holy Week shifts unscathed to March 15th. Fortunately, no more clashes are expected. until 2160, after which Christianity will be…
1949: Patrick Duffy, the American actor best known for playing Bobby Ewing in the American soap ‘Dallas’, was born in a conventional maternity ward, unaware that one day he will be reborn in a shower scene. Duffy, who converted to Buddhism in the 1970s, surprisingly sees nothing wrong with the reincarnation story, despite writing off an entire series as a dream and costing half the cast their jobs.
1949: Former Arsenal assistant coach Pat Rice was born in Northern Ireland. His parents show their allegiance to the old country and name him after St. Patrick, not because, as some have claimed, they like Chinese food.
1968: Mathew St Patrick, who finds fame as the gay black cop in Six Feet Under, was born – a happy coincidence for his last name, but where would Patrick St Patrick have been for a name.
1984: The start of the Oxford-Cambridge boat race is delayed by one day after the Cambridge vessel collides with a barge and sinks. Apparently, the boat’s helmsman, who is only 163 cm tall, could not see the barge due to a view obstructed by the protruding hooks of the oars.
1985: Night Stalker kills his first two victims. The Thin Lizzy tribute band had been warned against playing ‘Whiskey in the Jar’ again.
1992: Moscow hosts its first ever parade, with Russian marching bands, Cossack riders and 15 floats representing Russian companies. And Boris Yeltsin falls over the attempt at Riverdance.
1999: The International Olympic Committee expels six of its members following a bribery scandal, apparently due to its decision to give drug use official Olympic status. Although initially controversial, it continues to be the event’s most popular discipline.
2001: The inaugural St Patrick’s Day Three-legged Race is run. The event is declared an instant success by competitors who started with three legs, but pretty much all end up boneless.
2005: St Patrick’s Day Parade joins the party. Brian McKenna, landlord of The Globe, an Irish pub on Nørregade, threatens to make the city’s canals green for the day. Suddenly, out of nowhere, Copenhagen emerges as one of the best places in the world to spend the day.
2008: The tripod race is run in a snowstorm, and several competitors get lost, eventually finishing hours later. The organizers respond by introducing a limit – not on the consumption of beer (pass the tank), but on the end time.
2013: The Little Mermaid joins the party and turns green for the occasion along with the pyramids and the Christ the Redeemer statue in Rio.
2018: Ireland make it a perfect St Patrick’s Day by beating England at Twickenham to win the Six Nations Grand Slam. Their hosts could have had home advantage, but Ireland had a saint on their side and no one wanted to disappoint the birther.
2020: The disaster hits a few days before the big day, where the corona lockdown makes it necessary to cancel the entire program for the St Patrick’s Day festivities in Copenhagen. This year’s event will mark the return of the three-legged race and parade after more than 1,000 days of absence.